Pat's Answer

I have been really sad since I started secondary school

Your Question

I have been really sad ever since I started secondary school(3 years ago) I have been finding it really difficult to do simple things like get dressed or just getting out of bed, I also have loads of school assignments that I am behind on but I just dont know where to start. I have been finding it hard to do fun things too like go outside or talking with friends. I have a great family but sometimes they call me lazy because I dont go outside much but its just because im nervous and paranoid. I dont have a lot of friends and I feel like the ones I have dont like me. I have gone to many councilors and therapists, I have talked to teachers and family but I still feel like I am a lost cause. I am also to shy and nervous to call, or message. I am also really scared to go back to school as I am very lonely. 


Hello, thank you for reaching out to Ask Pat and telling us how you feel.  

We are sorry to hear that you are feeling sad since you started secondary school. You mention that doing simple tasks can be difficult and you find yourself falling behind with schoolwork. You are also finding socializing with your friends hard to do when you are feeling this way. Your family think you are lazy not wanting to do much, but they do not know the reasons are because you are paranoid and nervous.

You say that you spoke to teachers and family, and have gone to counselling. How did these chats go for you?  Would it be possible for you to talk with some of these people again and let them know how you are feeling today? It is important for your mental well-being that you get the help and support you deserve, and it is very important for you to know that you are not a lost cause. You are a young person who is going through a tough time and needs some support to help you get past it. It is important that you understand why you are feeling sad and to look at ways that can make you feel happy, because you have the right to be happy.

There are organisations that might be of guidance to you.  are just some websites that you could look at, which might help you understand what is going on for you or they may be able to offer direction with how you can avail of other supports. The Childline website has some articles on friendships, bullying and on emotions which you may also find useful: You might enjoy having a look at our Headbomz video about how talking can help make us stronger 

You feel that you are too shy to phone and talk with the Childline Team, and that is ok, but you have done brilliant writing to us today. Maybe it would be easier for you to talk to us by text or web chat? It might be difficult at first, and that is ok too. You can contact us as many times as you would like and you can have a quick chat or a long chat, it is up to you. Childline is your safe space to talk about whatever you choose. You do not have to be alone during this tough time. 

You can get in touch with Childline anytime. The Childline Team would enjoy talking to you about how you have been feeling. The services are free and confidential and are available twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Childline does not trace phone numbers or IP addresses and we really put values on your feelings and thoughts and we respect that your feelings are unique to you. How would you feel about sending us a text to 50101 or even have a web chat with us through so that we can help you look at some options that may be available to you? If you wanted to phone us at a later stage, the number is 1800 66 66 66.

We hope to hear from you soon. Take care of yourself,    


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