Alex's Answer
Wanting to be a better singer
Your Question
Hi alex. So basically, I want to sing well. But I cant. I get jealous easily. My friend Bella can hit high notes perfectly, while my voice keeps breaking/cracking when I try to hold a note. My voice is kinda like andra day’s voice. Or Lauren daigle, or adele. I can only do high notes and deeper notes. Not mid. I don’t want a mid or soft voice, but still. I wish I could send you a voice message of how I sing. I’m okay but my voice keeps breaking. Since I’m hitting puberty then I guess it makes sense for my voice to break because its JUST NOW STARTING TO DEVELOP but yeah. I love the greatest showman so I try to sound more like people from that. I can sing a million dreams, the other side, and never enough. But I cant do tightrope or rewrite the stars. In the greatest show then I CA N do the high notes and the “WOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH” but that’s about it. And whenever I record myself I sound bad. I can’t get a vocal coach bc 1 they cost money and 2 there are none around. I’m home schooled so I cant join a choir or anything (none around either) and I can only practice when my dad isn’t here (because I don’t want to hurt his ears with high notes XD) im not sure what to do. And I don’t trust my friends or family to give me an honest opinion and tell me what I’m doing wrong because they’ll just say I did perfect even if I ash for a HONEST opinion. People trust me with honest opinions because I wouldn’t lie to them. I don’t be mean but I’m like “maybe sing from your diaphragm more than your throat. And also sing from your chest. Also maybe go a bit deeper voice next time” and stuff. But yeah. And all I can do Is self train. But its hard because I sound differently to others than I do to myself. Although once every month I go to this kombucha bar and sing on open Mic night. But people there would just say I did good too because I’m a 12 year old.( I’m a girl) so yeah. But I’m jealous of my friend bella. She’s sang perfectly since she was really young. She was born with it while I have to work. i bet if I’d started earlier (maybe 3 years old since that’s the age that most professional singers, pianists, and others started their talent. ) I think its too late for me to learn now.
Answer
Hi there,
Thank you so much for reaching out to Ask Alex, this is positive step, and we are only delighted to be able to help offer you some support and guidance.
You sound like an amazing person. We are sorry to hear how you feel about your singing and how at times you may feel jealous of your friends’ singing abilities and question yours. Its great how aware you are of this at such a young age.
Have you ever shared how you feel with a trusted adult in your life? Someone that may be able to listen to you and help you feel more confident. This can be a parent, friend, or family member. Letting people we know and trust how we feel, can often be very helpful in our journey moving forward and make us feel better.
You deserve to feel confident in your singing and embrace your unique gifts. Self-confidence means feeling good about yourself, believing in your abilities, and believing in your worth and value as a person. People can struggle with self-confidence when they don’t feel they are good enough and often compare themselves to others, so you are not alone.
It’s important to know that you bring something to the world that no one else could ever bring because they are not you and that is your unique and authentic singing voice. Imagine, there will never be anyone in the whole entire universe who will be able to sing like you, because they are not you. And it is not too late, you are so young, and you have a whole life ahead of you.
Remember, that it’s okay to be different and accept ourselves just the way we are.
If you go onto the Childline website, there are lots of resources that may help you gain tools to feel more confidence. You can access this here www.childline.ie/how-i-feel/. Here is a lovely article to help you be kinder and more compassionate to yourself, remember you are doing your best! www.childline.ie/stop-
If you feel you need more support, you are more than welcome to contact Childline at any time (24hours a day, every day) on 1800 66 66 66 or chat to us online via Live Chat on www.childline.ie. There is someone there waiting to chat or talk with you right now!
Thank you for your question and we hope that you keep on singing and being you.
All the best,
Alex