Alex's Answer

They need a break from me

Your Question

Recently a friend of mine has said they want to have a break from me and they say it’s because of the way I treat them but I’ve treated them the same as all my other friends and I’ve even tried changing the way I act to make them feel more comfortable and awhile ago they were having suicidal thoughts so I tried helping them by talking to them and I don’t really know what to do 


Hello, thank you for contacting us here today at Ask Alex. 

You’re not sure what to do, your friend has said they want a break because of how you treat them; even though you treat them the same way as your other friends and you have tried to support them when they were having suicidal thoughts. It sounds like you’re going through a difficult friendship right now.  

We know it must be tough to hear a friend say they want to take a break from you; particularly when it sounds like you are a caring person and have done your best to be there for them when they were going through a difficult time. Sometimes people need time and space, for lots of reasons, and although it may be hard, we need to give them time to process how they’re feeling. By doing that, it shows that we’re listening to them, and respecting their feelings. Even if we don’t share the same perspective! 

Even though your friend has asked for a break, it seems like you can talk to each other and have some hard conversations in the past. Perhaps once you’ve both had some space to reflect, you may be able to try and have a conversation with each other and listen to each other’s point of view and see what you would like to do next. 

You may be having lots of different feelings around this, feeling confused, hurt, unsure, so it’s essential you look after yourself too, just like you care for your friends. Are you comfortable talking to any of your other friends about how things are for you? How you feel matters too. It’s important you have a space where you can share your thoughts. Are there any activities you enjoy doing that takes your mind off things? It’s important to continue doing things that you enjoy and make you happy. You may find this article helpful

Childline is always here for you too, 24/7, if ever you would like to chat. We won’t judge you or tell you what to do, but will give you a space to share what’s going on in your life. You can talk about your friendships or anything else that’s on your mind. We can chat about what you think you’d like to do. 

Thanks again for reaching out to us today, You sound like a really considerate, caring friend and we hope you figure things out with your friend, if that’s what you want to do. 

Take care of yourself and know you are never alone,


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