Alex's Answer
So annoying
Your Question
Its so annoying. People just keep assuming things. And accusing and lying and being cheating brats.ok so I guess you want context.so I’m a 12 year old female (little lady) and I am Christian. I’m a child of God and a strong believer. And I like correcting people, leading them in the right direction, kinda like a counselor or a therapist. And I hate when people assume I force everyone into my religion, and when they assume Christians are these horrible judgemental monsters.( Of course with them saying that, they’re the judgemental ones.) I just hate when people lie, cheat, and just act like total brats. I have this friend who gets upset SO easily. I don’t want to stay the night at her house, she gets mad. If I change my mind about anything, she gets mad. If I don’t want to do what she wants to do, she gets mad. (Sometimes. Sometimes she just gets sad or doesn’t understand me.) I also don’t like when others don’t understand my decisions. I understand people and put myself in other’s shoes a lot . its a part of what Jesus made me. A counselor. A missionary. Someone who cares and understands. Although the one thing I don’t understand is why people hate themselves. I’ve been abused and I turned out fine. Although one of the things with me is i find it hard to say no to that one friend who gets mad. I don’t want her to hate me. Although our other friend b has been helping me with that. Reminding me that she won’t hate me forever and that she’ll get over it. I also don’t understand why people are so sensitive. Like when I’m insulted I just ignore it because I know its a lie. Sometimes I try to seek the truth out of what they say and kinda “fix” things.but yeah.
Answer
Hello there, welcome to Ask Alex!
Firstly, we want to say how courageous and strong you are for reaching out and expressing your feelings. It’s completely understandable to feel frustrated when people make assumptions about you or your beliefs without truly understanding who you are. You have every right to stand up for yourself and correct misconceptions, just as you’re doing now.
Being a 12-year-old navigating friendships and beliefs can be challenging, especially when faced with friends who might not always understand or respect your decisions. It’s important to remember that true friends will accept you for who you are, including your boundaries and preferences. It’s okay to prioritise your own well-being and happiness, even if it means saying no to certain situations or activities. Your friend B sounds like a supportive presence in your life, and it’s great that you have someone reminding you of your worth and the importance of setting boundaries.
We admire your empathy and compassion for others, as well as your ability to see beyond surface-level reactions. It’s clear that you have a caring and understanding nature, which are incredible qualities to have, especially at your age. Remember, it’s ok to feel confused or frustrated by people’s behaviours’, but what matters most is how you respond with kindness and patience.
Lastly, regarding your struggles with saying no to your friend who easily gets upset, it’s important to prioritise your own feelings and well-being. True friendships are built on mutual respect and understanding, and it’s okay to communicate your needs openly and honestly. Your friend may need time to adjust, but ultimately, those who truly care about you will respect your boundaries and support you. These articles from the Childline website may be helpful www.childline.ie/how-to-know-when-to-break-up-with-a-friend/ and www.childline.ie/how-to-build-healthy-friendships-and-relationships/.
Remember, you are not alone in facing these challenges. If you ever need someone to talk to or to explore some of your options, you can always contact us at Childline by freephone 1800 66 66 66 or Live Chat at www.childline.ie. We’re here for you, anytime, for any reason, and we’re always ready to listen without judgment.
Take care of yourself, know we are here for you, any time for any reason,
Alex