Pat's Answer

To Pat / 03 June 2020


Your Question

Hi pat, im a 13 year old girl and im bisexual ive never been attracted to boys and girls for a while now but I only just confirmed it was own mind,I’ve never been in a relationship before and I haven’t come out to anyone yet I don’t have anyone to talk to about this I would like to talk to my mum about it but I love my dad and i Dont want him to think i dont trust him. What do I do?

From Pat / 15 July 2020


Hi there, you are very welcome to Ask Pat.

Sounds like you have a lot going on for you at the moment. You are saying that you have recently confirmed in your own mind that you are bisexual, and that you haven’t yet come out to anyone, and that you really would like to tell you Mum but that you love your Dad and also at the same time you don’t trust him. Thank you so much for sharing this with us on Ask Pat, it has been a really brave thing for you to do.

Coming out to your parents in relation to your sexuality is not an easy thing to do. From what you are saying you want to tell your Mum first.  Having someone to talk to is a good support and right now it sounds like your mum would be the person you feel you can reach out to.

Am I right in sensing that having both your parent’s acceptance is important for you and it sounds like you feel you need a little extra support into how you tell them especially your Dad.

You have the right to get support to help you through this and there are support groups there to help you, to offer you guidance in the process of coming out to your loved ones. How would you feel about getting in touch with them? Sometimes it can be helpful to think if there is there a trusted adult in your life that you could chat to as well about your thoughts and feelings?

In addition to that you are so welcome to contact any of the Childline Services. There are several ways in which you can do that. Each of the services, are free to you, the services are here to listen to children, and are a safe place for you to chat. All of the services are accessible to you 24/7 and are non-judgemental.

The Childline number is 1800 66 66 66, Free Text 50101 and webchat is

You are free to contact us anytime, and thank you for reaching out to Pat today.

We wish you all the best,


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