Pat's Answer

To Pat / 28 July 2020

My parents keep putting me in between their fights

Your Question

Hi pat, I need advice my parents keep putting me in between they’re fights and It makes me sad. I feel like I’m the problem

From Pat / 19 August 2020


Welcome to Ask Pat,

Thank you so much for contacting us with your worry. It sounds like you are going through a hard time at home at the moment. From what you are saying your parents are arguing and you feel that you may be the cause of the fights.

It sounds like the arguments are making you feel sad and the situation is hurting you.  You are wondering how to get help in resolving being put in the center of the arguments and to stop feeling like you are the reason of what is going on between your parents.

You have the right to be listened to, the right to be heard and the right to be safe and happy in your home. The arguments may be interfering with that safe feeling. How would you feel about chatting to your parents about how their arguments upset you? Perhaps at a time when there are no distractions around. This might help you and them in realizing how their fighting is making you sad. Everyone has the right to get support when they are going through a bad phase from time to time. If you don’t feel comfortable chatting to your mum and dad, do you have someone else that you trust to get support from? Is there another adult in your life that you would feel comfortable talking to about what is going on? A grandparent, an aunt or uncle, or maybe a sports coach. Somebody who knows you and your family who might help you.

Childline is always here for you too. We are a listening service open 24 hours a day 7 days a week for young people 18 years and younger. We do not judge you or tell you what to do. We can chat with you about your family situation or we can chat about something else. Childline gives you the space to talk about whatever you want to, big or small.  The services are accessible to you through our phone line 1800 66 66 66, or our text service at 50101. There is also a web chat service through our website On the Childline website, you can find further information about families under the Info and Advice Section

I hope this some help to you and if you want to chat to someone, we would be really happy to hear from you.

Thank you again for sharing your problem with us.

Stay safe,


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