Pat's Answer

To Pat / 21 October 2020

My parents always favor my brother, even if we are fighting which we do when he invades my privacy

Your Question

My parents always favor my brother, even if we are fighting which we do when he invades my privacy and goes through my draws and steals my stuff and when I complain I am made out to be the bad guy, my mum is like oh you k ow what a devil your sister turns into why do I still do it. It Hurst that I’m ways at fault even when it’s not my fault. I am currently on matric and I asked for a care package with snacks which they bought my brother when he was in matric and I was told that they will see and they still haven’t but they went and bought my brother a whole bunch of stuff when he went on a trip for 2 days how is that fair? I feel so unloved, my mum never hugs me if I go to hug her she pushes me away and tells me she is busy. I just want to be loved, I feel like I can’t live like this anymore I have tried to end my life once but was unsuccessful. What do I do.. I don’t want to die but living brings me so much of pain and I can’t even talk to my parents because they will just swear me and scream at me they don’t understand when I try to explain how I am feeling and to them I’m being a drama queen. I really can’t live like this anymore what do I do? 

From Pat / 6 November 2020


Hi, you are very welcome to Ask Pat

It sounds like you have multiple things going on for you right now. You feel that you are treated differently in your family compared to your brother. You feel that your relationship with your mum is one where you feel unloved. You also mention that you have tried to end your life before and you feel that you just cannot keep going on with the way things are for you at the moment. 

Trying to end your life would be a concern for us. You have the right to be safe and have the right to medical help. Did you receive support at that time? Are you able to access those health care professionals now? and are 2 websites where you will find help and support for your suicidal ideation. You can also check out some articles on our Childline website which may help you also. 

The family dynamic can be difficult at times. Every family is different. From everything you have shared with us, it appears that you are aware of your feelings in your current family situation. That is a great starting point for you.  Would there be a trusted adult in your life who you could discuss what is going on for you right now?  It is really helpful to talk to someone about your how you are feeling. You did a great job sharing with us. You have mentioned that you do not get on well with your parents and that you have tried to talk to them but they call you a drama queen. Do you have an aunt, uncle, grandparent, or a teacher that you can chat with. You have the right to be listened to and to be respected, what is it like knowing that? You may get some insight into families by reading articles on our website

If you are not ready to talk to somebody that you know, how would you feel talking to us at Childline? The people at Childline will listen to you without judgement and without telling you what to do. We can chat about the options that are available to you and help you with your decisions. The services are free, and the team is available twenty-four hours a day, every day to talk with you. We can be contacted by phone at 1800 66 66 66 or by text at 50101. There is also our web chat service through the website

It is important that you talk to somebody about everything that is going on for you, you have the right to feel that you are being listened to. You have been great in describing your feelings to us, and that is a big step to write them down. The next step would be to talk it through with someone. Remember, you do not have to go through this on your own. Childline is here to support you whenever you are ready to get in touch.

Mind yourself and stay safe,


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