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My friends talk about me behind my back

Why are my friends pretending to be my friend making me feel bad


Hi there, you are very welcome to Ask Alex.     

Thank you for contacting us. We understand that it’s not always easy to share how we’re feeling, 

We’re sorry to hear that you’re going through such a difficult situation. It can be very hurtful when you feel like your friends are not being genuine or are talking about you behind your back. It’s important to address these feelings and concerns. Here are a few suggestions on how to handle the situation: 

Communicate openly: If you feel comfortable, try talking to your friends about your concerns. Express how you’ve been feeling and ask them directly if there are any issues or misunderstandings. Honest communication can help clarify the situation. 

Reflect on the evidence: Make sure you have concrete evidence or examples of the behaviour that’s causing you distress. This will help you articulate your concerns more effectively and provide specific instances when discussing the issue. 

Seek support from others: Reach out to other friends, family members, or trusted individuals who may provide support and perspective. Having a support system can be crucial during challenging times. 

Self-care: Focus on your own well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and surround yourself with positive influences. Taking care of yourself emotionally and mentally is essential during challenging times. 

Consider professional help: If the situation persists and has a significant impact on your mental health, consider seeking the guidance of a therapist or counsellor. They can offer valuable insights and strategies to cope with difficult social situations. 

Remember, you deserve to be surrounded by genuine, supportive friends. If certain individuals are causing you distress, it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being and make choices that are in your best interest. 

You can always reach out to Childline if you feel you would like to talk through things a little more. You can contact the Childline Team by phone on 1800 66 66 66 or through Live Chat on You can start a chat by clicking on the Orange Tab on the right-hand side of your screen. Childline services are free and confidential, and are available 24 hours, 7 days a week.  You may find this article helpful, it also give links to other helpful articles on the Childline website.

We hope that some of the above information is of use to. Please keep reaching out and know that there are supports out there that can help you.  

Take care of yourself,


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