Alex's Answer
My friend is threatening to take her life
Your Question
Hi Alex My friend has been threatening her life, I’m only 11 and she’s 13, I don’t know
what to do because I can’t really tell anyone, her parents are always angry at her
and she said she’s going to kill herself and I’m scared, I don’t know what to do at this
point, I’ve told my parents and have people looking after her but I still can’t do
anything about it, I’m terrified and I just want her to be ok, i really don’t want her to
die and I don’t know how to cope with this stress, I’m autistic and it’s extremely
difficult for me to help her when she won’t listen
Answer
Hi there, and welcome to Ask Alex,
Thanks for reaching out to us here. You have been very brave in opening up about your friend. It is understandable that you are feeling so scared. Well done on telling your parents; it is important that you have people supporting you as you support your friend.
It sounds like you have been trying very hard to get your friend to see things the way you see them. It is understandable that you would like to change your friend’s mind. However, what do you think it would be like for you to try and take the pressure off your friend changing her mind? Instead of trying to get your friend to listen, do you think you could listen to her? Do you think you could ask your friend to explain what things are like for her or maybe just sit with her and let her tell you about their feelings without trying to convince her otherwise?
It is understandable if you find this difficult, especially as you have autism, so it is important that you are not alone in giving this support to your friend. How does contacting Childline in these difficult moments sound to you? Do you think you could ask your friend to contact Childline herself, or maybe you could both call together? It is free to call on 1800 66 66 66, or you can chat online at www.childline.ie; there is always someone here to chat and/or listen, confidentially and with no judgment. Everyone in Childline is trained to listen to every child and their feelings, especially the difficult thoughts of suicide.
As we said above, it is important that as you support your friend, you are supported too. You may find this article helpful www.childline.ie/how-to-care-for-someone-who-is-going-through-a-tough-time/. And remember, you do not have to go through this alone, we are here for you at any time.
Take care yourself, and well done on being concerned for your friend. She is lucky to have you looking out for her.
Alex
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