Alex's Answer

Hi and welcome to Ask Alex. 

Thank you for taking the time to put forward questions and thoughts you have with things in your life. It is so important that we speak out and look for support wherever and whenever we need. 

You have said that your cousin has taken things off you in the past and tried to do that again, that must be very frustrating. Also, you have highlighted that he will be 6 and can’t even speak right, is that right? You say your mam sent you to your room for no reason and that your family are not nice, we are very sorry to hear that it must be hard on you. You have also spoken about your access to YouTube being taken away and not getting it back. That sounds tough, I see you had Covid also we hope you had a quick recovery from that and are feeling better now. Finally, you said “my parents don’t even know me” this is concerning to hear that those closest to you don’t know you.  

Starting with your cousin it can be very hard when assuming he is younger, cousins come over to visit and try to take things that belong to you. Quite often younger children can think they can have everything they see but it is important to try and explain to them that you can share and play with things together but that the items belong to you and will stay in your house. It looks like your parents helped you with the frisbee so it can be helpful if you notice your cousin taking something that you tell your parents, and they will get it off them before they go. I know it’s not always possible, but you could put away things that are important to you in place your cousin wouldn’t be able to get them when you know he is calling over. You also spoke about him not being able to talk properly I am sure that his family are supporting him with that but if you can’t understand what he is saying it could be worth asking his mother or father to explain or the same goes if you don’t think that he understands what you are saying.  

You mentioned “I do not have a very nice family” and with that spoke about things you appear to enjoy like YouTube being taken off you and said, “my parents don’t even know me”. That must be so hard on you. Have you tried speaking to your parents about these things?? It is important that within your family your voice is heard and that they listen and know who you are as a person. It can feel like nobody listens as days can be a big rush from morning to evening following a certain routine and not finding a time or space to stop and talk. It is important that you can turn to a trusted adult in your life like your parents, grandparents, uncle, aunt, whoever you are most comfortable with to discuss things that are on your mind. Your parents may not know that you think they don’t know you or that you think your family isn’t very nice, or that you miss YouTube. You must give them a chance and communicate it with them, let them know where you are at and what you are feeling. If you cannot speak to them, directly use another trusted adult you are close to, they might be able to help you navigate how to approach it. It is important that you set aside a specific time in which you will have the full attention of your parents, not in the middle of dinner or when they might be going to an appointment etc.., a space where both you and them are free to give it the time and space it deserves. Don’t be afraid to speak up you could be surprised with your parents’ reaction and more than that it will empower you. 

If you feel you are not ready to speak to someone close to you, please know you are very welcome to chat with the Childline Team by phone on 1800 66 66 66 or through our web chat on www.childline.ie. You can start a chat by clicking on the Orange Tab on the right-hand side of your screen. Childline services are free and confidential, and are available 24 hours, 7 days a week.  

We hope that some of the above information has helped you. I would like to thank you for contacting Ask Alex and we wish you the best going forward.   

Take care of yourself, 

Alex