Alex's Answer

It's been a bit tough lately

Your Question

Hello Alex, So recently it’s been a bit tough for me. On Saturday, my mam went on my laptop and started going through my stuff. She was embarrassing me in front of my dad and my brother for going on Tripadvisor, Facebook and Reddit. I really didn’t like that and it made me feel bad. Also for a long time, there’s this guy at school called G and he bullies me and S. He said that S was dumb and I told him to leave S alone. He said S watches tv and he reads books and he said he was only allowed tv at the weekends. So he should really just leave me alone. My mam also said if I read 4 books she would give me 50 quid if I read them all. On Sunday, I had an orienteering day with my scouts and I hate scouts so much and I never want to go back. I got all mucky and I didn’t like that. Then afterwards, my mam said my football training was on Thursdays from 7-8pm and cubs starts at 7pm and ends at 8:30 so I can finally get out of Cubs. I told my mam I wanted to get a phone with the 50 quid and plus the other money I have and she said no. I mean she’s not letting me do what I want with my money. No fair! I’m glad I’m off school for 2 weeks for Easter. 

Answer

Hi there, thanks for reaching out to Ask Alex 

We are sorry to hear that you have been going through a tough time lately and you are so brave to reach out and share this with us. Family, school, and friendships can all be difficult to navigate sometimes but remember, things will get better.  

You have told us that your mam is embarrassing you in front of other people which understandably makes you feel bad. You have also told us that you experience bullying at school. 

Firstly, family relationships can be difficult to navigate but everyone has the right to be treated with kindness and respect. You have the right to your privacy and to feel heard and respected. Have you been able to speak to your Mam about how you are feeling? We know it is hard to talk about situations, especially when we’re upset, and our emotions are influencing how we communicate with others. When you are feeling upset it can be difficult to express yourself clearly and if the other person is also upset, it can be hard for them to listen to and accept how you’re feeling. That being said, have you tried to speak to your Mam about your feelings when you are both calm and relaxed? We are delighted to hear that you no longer have to attend Cubs and can enjoy football training instead. 

With regards to bullying at school, bullying is never acceptable. All schools should have an anti-bullying policy in place to protect students from bullying. You could speak to a teacher you trust or a school counsellor about what you are experiencing, and they will provide you with the support you need to report the bullying and resolve the situation.  

It is important to have open and honest conversations about your feelings and seek help from people (such as family members, teachers, coaches and counsellors) that can support you, so well done for taking the step and reaching out.  

If you ever feel like chatting about what is on your mind or how you are feeling, no matter how big or small, Childline is here for you 24/7. We offer a free, non-judgemental, anonymous listening service to young people all around Ireland. You can contact us for free at 1800 66 66 66or through Live Chat at www.Childline.ie 

If you’re not ready to talk to someone you know just yet about how tough things are, here are some links that might be of help How To Manage Family Relationships (childline.ie);  8 Things To Do When You Feel Overwhelmed At Home (childline.ie); What To Do If Someone Bullies You at School and 5 Great Tips on how to Avoid Being Affected By Bullying.  

Have a fabulous Easter break and we hope to hear from you again soon. 

Alex

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