I’m 13 years old and my Dad shouts and curses at me and sometimes hits me too
I’m a 13-year-old girl, and my dad yells at me and curses at me when I do something wrong. Like today I was doing homework and he said that I needed to close my computer even though my homework is on my computer, and I was stuck on a problem and he yelled at me about how I’m lying and I can just watch a YouTube video with him and find a solution. But I said no, because last time he did that he got mad and lost his temper and started cursing at me. He also hits me sometimes when he’s really mad but not to the point where there’s any marks or anything. My mom doesn’t like when he hits me and sometimes tries to talk him out of it but he just does it again at another time. Plus, it’s gotten to the point where my mom says if my dad hits me really hard again they’re getting divorced. And I hate my dad there hasn’t been 1 week where I haven’t cried because of my dad. I don’t know what to do! Please help!
Hi there and welcome to Ask Alex.
Thank you so much for reaching out to us and trusting us with your thoughts. We know it can be a difficult thing to do, but we also know how great it is for young people to share their experiences and their emotions. Talking about and sharing what is going on for you is a big step forward so well done for doing so.
We are really concerned to hear that your dad yells and curses at you a lot and sometimes, when he gets really angry, hits you. You mentioned that your mum does not like it when he hits you and sometimes tries to talk him out of it and has said that if he hits you hard again then they are getting divorced. It’s completely understandable that you are very upset by this and that you are looking for help.
It’s important that you know that you have the right to feel safe, free from danger and happy in your home and no one has the right to hurt you in any way. This is quite serious and should not be happening to you or any other children or teenagers. You also have the right to seek support from the Gardai or Tusla Child and Family services. Tusla can be contacted via their website: https://www.tusla.ie/. If ever you feel you are a risk to your own safety or in danger from others at any time, you can contact a GP, the emergency services by calling 112 or 999 at no charge or you could present yourself at your closest A&E department.
Do you have a trusted adult in your life who you would feel comfortable telling this too? This can be a family member like an aunt, uncle or grandparent, or someone outside of the family like a teacher, neighbour, or sports coach. They may be able to help ensure that you get the correct support and help keep you safe. It’s important that you get the help that you deserve.
Remember, you can always get in touch with Childline. Our webchat service can be accessed here: https://www.childline.ie/, our text service can be reached on 50101 or you can phone us on 1800 66 66 66 to talk about what is going on for you if you don’t feel ready to talk to someone in your life quite yet. We are here for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. While we will not tell you what to do, we are here to listen to and support you, and to help you to explore the options that are available to you in your life. We are here to help you in a way that suits you.