Alex's Answer
I want to get my life back on track
Your Question
I’m on here because I honestly want to get my life back on track, but sometimes everything just seems to fall apart. I think I’m just looking for someone/something to keep me grounded in reality, and not drifting off into my own thoughts and emotions. I know people are going to say “why don’t you tell someone”, “why don’t you get a therapist” and my reply is that it’s very hard for me to tell someone irl (if I do tell someone, it would change the perception that my family/friends have of me, and make them worry which would probably just cause me more stress) I know this is a lot to ask, but I’m looking for someone who wants to be a friend, and who can keep me accountable and connected (just send me a message once in a while)
Answer
Hi there, and welcome to Ask Alex.
Thank you for contacting Ask Alex to talk about what’s on your mind. From what you’ve said it sounds like you have been having a tough time with feeling that your life is off course, and that you’re unsure how to get things back on track when it seems like everything is falling apart. These sound like difficult thoughts and feelings to be dealing with so it’s completely understandable that you might be struggling to handle this alone and that you’d like someone to help you with this.
You say that people may have suggestions of “going to someone” or “getting a therapist” and it sounds like you feel these are unsuitable options for you. It is okay not to take up people’s advice or to turn down certain options as you are the expert on your own life and have the right to have a say in decisions concerning you. It also sounds like you worry about discussing these thoughts and feelings with those closest to you as you fear that it may impact their perception of you. It can be difficult to know how someone may react when you discuss something personal or difficult with them so being reluctant to do that is completely understandable. It sounds like you are looking for support that would be non-judgemental and someone that you can chat to on a casual basis about what’s going on in your life.
For a lot of people, talking to someone can help things seem more manageable and if talking to someone in your life is not an option right now, maybe you could call Childline on 1800 66 66 66, contact us by text on 50101, or through our webchat at https://www.childline.ie/. The Childline team is there to listen 24 hours a day, every day. Our services are free, confidential, and non-judgemental. Chatting to Childline may also help you to explore your options and help you gain some clarity about what support you want to have in your life and to identify who in your life could be that support person.
The following website may also be helpful to you in identifying potential support services you could access that may suit your needs: www.spunout.ie is a website dedicated to young people and covers a very broad range of subject matter as well as services that are available to young people. Along with looking for external support, self-care plays a huge part in how to cope with life’s challenges. Eating well, socialising, exercising, mindfulness and meditation are just a few basic things that could make a big difference if added to your daily routine. Maybe this could be a good starting point for you – identifying the things that could help you to get that sense of being grounded.
Thanks again for getting in touch, we hope you find this answer helpful and hope you will feel comfortable enough to get in touch with us again if you’d like to.
Take care,
Alex.