Pat's Answer

I hate being called a girl

Your Question

I had a physical exam yesterday, and I’ve never realized how much I hate being called a girl. I like being a little feminine, and having a small waist and stuff, but I’ve always disliked my chest.. it makes me uncomfortable. But I don’t want to be a boy, either.

Answer

Welcome to Ask Pat, thank you for getting in touch. 

After your physical exam, you say it made you realise how much you hate being called a girl and how you dislike your chest. You found it uncomfortable. You also mention that you do not want to be a boy.

It sounds like the physical exam has brought up questions and confusion for you, making you feel a little uncomfortable about your body, and in particular your chest. It also seems you may be a little confused about your identity. Sometimes it can take young people time to feel comfortable with their bodies, to feel good about themselves, or just to figure things out. Your feelings are understandable, and we are glad you decided to reach out. It is a brave thing for you to do. 

You have the right to be happy and you have the right to your feelings. Have you ever spoke to anyone about your gender identity? You have the right to speak with a trusted adult. This adult could be an immediate family member, another relative, a youth leader, or a teacher. How would you feel about that? We realise it can be difficult or awkward to talk with someone close to us about what is going on. Sometimes it might be easier to talk to somebody that we do not know. We all need support in relation to what is going on for us and you have the right to get support too. Maybe you would like to chat more about your feelings with us here in Childline? We would love to listen to you, and you are welcome to call us anytime.  

Have you heard of the websites www.spunout.ie and www.belongto.org?  There are lots of articles on these websites which may be helpful to you in clarifying some questions you may have around your gender identity. There is some information on the Childline website too, which you may like to look at www.childline.ie/gender-identity/.  

There are other Childline services available for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week too. Each of the services are completely confidential, if you do not give any identifying information about yourself. We do not trace calls, use caller ID or IP addresses, so it is a safe place for you. You can phone Childline on 1800 666 666, text us at 50101 or web chat with us through the website www.childline.ie. You can choose what you would like to talk about, and you can contact us as many times as you need. 

Thank you for reaching to Ask Pat. We hope that you will get some information and support from the services given above. Remember, Childline is here for you whenever you need us. 

Mind yourself and keep safe,  

Pat 

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