Alex's Answer

I get a weird feeling around my uncle

Your Question

 since i was very young i would get weird feeling around my uncle like he would make me very uncomfortable and would go out of his way to do it knowing fully well i didn’t like it first it would start off as remarks such as ‘my princess’ or just blatantly staring at me or my ass ; it then happened when was thirteen when my mum was upstairs and no one was around he slapped my ass and gripped it i felt uncomfortable and started crying when i went upstairs as i knew that it wasn’t normal as its your uncle someone who has seen you grow up i do personally feel like he doesn’t see me in that niece way is this sexual assault ? i did tell my mum and she told me that she would tell him to not do it again :i sthat enough ?but i can still still feel his stares when i’m around him and he still calls me that stupid name ‘my princess’ hence why i stay in my room when he comes over.

Answer

Hi there, welcome to Ask Alex, and thanks for reaching out with your question. It sounds like you’ve been going through a tough time.
 
You’re saying that your uncle makes you feel uncomfortable, has slapped your ass, and still stares at you and calls you princess when he comes over.
 
Firstly, we think it is important that you know that no one has the right to hurt you or harm you in any way. You have the right to feel safe and protected at all times.
 
You asked if your uncle’s behaviour is classified as sexual assault. Sexual harassment is defined as the making of unwelcome and inappropriate sexual remarks or physical advances. Here is an article from the Childline website which may give you some guidance: www.childline.ie/what-to-do-if-you-experience-sexual-harassment/.
 
You have said that you have already spoken to your mum about this. That’s great that you’ve already spoken out. We understand that it can be really difficult to talk about what’s going on for you, so you’ve been so brave already. Would you be able to speak to your mum again about how you’re feeling? It’s important that you can talk to her (or somebody else) again, as she might feel that your uncle has stopped making you feel uncomfortable.
 
There is another article on the Childline website that may give you some guidance on putting in a boundary with your uncle, letting him know that it is not ok for him to continue making comments that are upsetting for you. You can find it here: www.childline.ie/how-to-set-boundaries-in-different-areas-of-your-life/
 
You can also contact us here at Childline if you want to chat a bit more about what’s going on for you. We offer a free confidential listening service and are available 24/7 by phone at 1800 66 66 66 or through Live Chat at www.childline.ie. We would love to hear from you.
 
Take care of yourself,
Alex

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