Alex's Answer

I can't stop thinking about this guy

Your Question

I have had a crush on a guy for years, I don’t feel attracted to anyone else. I think he like me too but I cant be sure. What should I do, I cant stop thinking about him.


Hi and welcome to Ask Alex,
We would like to thank you for using our outlet to explore and question things that are on your mind. It is so important that you have a safe space to turn to for things that you might be questioning.
You have said, ‘I have a crush on a guy for years, I don’t feel attracted to anyone else. I think he likes me too, but I can’t be sure. What should I do? I can’t stop thinking about him.’ This must be very exciting, scary, and all those other things you feel when you have a crush. If you have such strong feelings and the other person is around the same age as you with no other relationships that you know of, why not go for it? Try talking to the guy a little more, build up your confidence around him, see what common interests you both have. Take the initiative to ask him out when you are ready, live in the moment, and see what happens.
You could speak to mutual friends to see if you can get a better idea of his feelings for you. You have said you think he likes you too; why not find out? The worst-case scenario is that he is not ready for a relationship or that he does not feel the same way, which of course can be hard when that happens, but holding onto it and wondering ‘what if,’ possibly seeing him couple up with another, is even harder. Closure and trying, even if the outcome you wanted isn’t the one you get, is a lot easier to move forward with and gives you back the time you might be giving the crush, either to the person if you get together or to other things if it’s something that doesn’t work out.
You can always talk to someone close to you in your immediate family or even an uncle, aunt, or grandparent who might surprise you with stories of similar things happening to them and what they did about it, which might inspire you.
If you feel you want to go through it more or you just need to talk about anything, please know that our Childline Team is available by phone on 1800 66 66 66 or through our Live Chat on You can start a chat by clicking on the Orange Tab on the right-hand side of your screen. Childline services are free and confidential, and are available 24 hours, 7 days a week.
Take things at your pace and only do what you are comfortable with. Good luck with everything; we hope it all works out for you.

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