How do I get over my ex-boyfriend's passing?
since my ex boyfriend died last year ive felt numb and alone and it feels as if i cant leave this cycle of sadness
Hello, and welcome to Ask Alex.
Thank you for sharing this with us, you are so brave in doing so as sharing feelings and thoughts can be a hard thing to do.
Firstly, dealing with the loss of someone you care about can be incredibly difficult, so please don’t be hard on yourself or put pressure on yourself about it. Try not compare your experience to how others experience death; this is your journey.
Secondly, there is no one formula for coming to terms with the death of someone you care about as everyone grieves differently. In saying that, stages of grief have been identified by Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, a Swiss-American psychiatrist, which include denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. There’s no specific order to these stages and not everyone will experience every stage while they are grieving. You can read more about the stages of grief here: https://www.psycom.net/stages-of-grief
It truly is good to talk to someone about what you are experiencing or about the person you are missing – even if it’s just to share a little memory of what your boyfriend liked; a particular Youtuber, something on Netflix or a Spotify playlist. What would it be like to share that memory with others? Perhaps you have someone in your life, a friend or an adult you could share your memories with, or indeed, just how you are feeling on that day.
The team here in Childline will certainly listen to you. At Childline Listening service, is here to listen and you can share with us your good and/or challenging moments. If you want to cry or give out, we are here. We are available to you 24/7 on 1800 66 66 66 and or via our webchat which you can find here: www.childldine.ie. You can read more about bereavement and ways of coping here: https://www.childline.ie/learning-to-live-with-grief/ and if you feel you need further support, know that these services are available to you: https://www2.hse.ie/mental-health/services-support/bereavement/
Please reach out, we would love to hear more from you; we are here for you, and we care.