Why don't people listen to me or my mum?
My mum has been in court for years now because I don’t want to see my dad as he drinks to much and was abusive to is. I have been made to see loads of councillors and still seeing one about four now. I haven’t seen my dad in four years and still don’t want to see him. Why are they still not listening to me or my mum
Thank you for getting in touch with your question.
It sounds like your home life has been very stressful for the past few years due to ongoing legal battle between your mother and your father. I hear and understand that you do not wish to see your father due to his alcohol abuse and abusive behaviour towards you. Unfortunately, when people abuse substances such as alcohol it can result in relationship breakdowns within families. This sounds like something that has happened between you are your father. It’s important to remember that it is not ok for anyone to be abusive towards us in any way. This can be particularly upsetting and difficult for us to understand when this abuse has come from a parent or a carer. Under Irish Law, children and young people have rights. Here is a link to the Children’s Right Alliance: www.childrensrights.ie/content/need-legal-information-children-young. With the support of your mother, it may be helpful to contact them and explain your situation as they will be best placed to advise you on your rights and further support. As it sounds that you are still feeling frustrated and confused as to why your concerns are not being heard or taken into account in court.
When anyone experiences any type of abusive behaviour in their life especially as children it is very important that the adults in our lives provide us with the positive support and interventions that we need to heal from this abuse. Attending counselling is one of the vital supports that adults can put in place to support your emotional, social and psychological development. It sounds like it might have been hard for you to meet with lots of different counselors in the beginning, but it sounds like you have found one that you ‘click with’ now. This is very important because we understand how hard it can be for anyone to open up and talk about their feelings and experiences to date. This can take some time and it might feel like a slow process especially when there are ongoing difficulties in court.
We are also always here for you at Childline, if you wanted to talk some more about what’s going on with your dad. It is a safe space for you to talk without judgement, and there will always be some there to listen 24/7, either through our Live Chat on www.childline.ie or on the phone on 1800 66 66 66.
Thank you for contacting us.