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What can I do to help my homosexual, genderfluid friend whose mom is homophobic and abusive?

My friends mom is homophobic and my friend is homosexual and genderfluid. Xier mom honestly seems a bit abusive what do I do?

Answer

Hi there and welcome to Ask Alex. 

It seems like there is a lot going on for you at the moment, so thanks for reaching out to us.  It sounds like your worried about your friend as they are homosexual and genderfluid, but their mom is homophobic and a bit abusive. 

First of all, it seems like you are a very caring person and a good friend as you are looking at how to best support your friend. It sounds like you feel your friend’s mom can be a bit abusive. No one has the right to harm you or hurt you physically, mentally or emotionally. All young people have the right to feel safe and happy, especially in their own home. One thing that we can do is to talk to a trusted adult in our lives – this could be a parent, teacher, youth worker or family member. Have you been able to share your concerns for your friend with a trusted adult, or support your friend to reach out and talk to an adult they trust? 

If your friend feels they are not safe at home, or anywhere else, they can contact the emergency services for help on 999 or 112. They can always get in touch with Tusla- the Child and Family agency;. it is their job to make sure all young people are safe and looked after in Ireland.  You can visit their website at https://changingfutures.ie/. 

Your friend can also look at https://www.belongto.org/. Belongto is an LGBTQ+ service that offers support and advice for both adults and young people. Childline also have some articles that may help which you can find here: https://www.childline.ie/. 

Remember that both you and your friend can always phone Childline on 1800 66 66 66 to talk about what is going on. We are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and can be contacted by text on 50101 or web chat at www.childline.ie. We are happy to be there and listen to whatever it is that’s going on for you. 

We hope that the information we have given you is useful. Please do not hesitate to get in touch with us if you have any other questions.   

Take care,   

Alex 

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