Pat's Answer

To Pat /28 August 2020

Recently I have been struggling to get to sleep, sometimes lying in bed for hours, with no prevail

Your Question

Hi, recently have been struggling to get to sleep, sometimes lying in bed for hours, with no prevail. I have loads of thoughts and worries that keep me up.Its hard to make this structured so im just going to unload all my thoughts and questions here. I have everything a child could want, games, clothes, money and attenti on, but i still feel meh and i feel guilty because of that. I am very shy at school and i find it very hard to talk to strangers on my own…etc. I cant talk to the boys in my school and if i do i end up regretting what ive said. My freinds are not completely trustworthy so i cant unload my problems onto them. I am scared to tell my parents in case they say i am over reacting or just being silly. Every day gets worse and my motivation is completely gone. When I look in the mirror, i see plain ugly. nothing strikes me as nice when i look at my face. this kills my confidence.. Also my parents have sky high expectations of me, that i am not sure i can fulfil. For some reason i took to the internet to search for what is wrong with me. According to Web.MD,i have anxiety,depression,paranoia and insomnia. I know its bad to self diagnose but I NEED ANSWERS! I am too scared to tell anyone about how im feeling, ad i cant express my ideas or concerns. Please help me i feel like im losing my sanity! Thank you, Anonymous

From Pat / 17 September 2020

Answer

Hello you are very welcome to Ask Pat,

Thank you so much for trusting us with your thoughts. We know it can be difficult, but we also know how great it is for young people to share their problems. Talking about and sharing what is going on for you is a big step forward.

You are saying that you are struggling to sleep, that you have thoughts of guilt about feeling low and that you are struggling with your friendships, struggling with school, the expectation that your parents have on you and you feel that you are struggling with your self-confidence. 

It seems to us that you have so much going on for you right now. You have done your own research online but it is great for us to hear that you acknowledge online research doesn’t give you the answers that you need. 

You are taking the right steps in reaching out and seeking help. That is such a brave thing to do. You have a right to get help and support for everything you have mentioned. You say that you don’t want to bother your parents, and that is ok, would there another trusted adult that you could go to? This adult could be an aunt, uncle, or grandparent. We know that it can be hard to open up to someone who is close to us, so maybe talking to somebody outside of your family who you are comfortable talking to might work better for you at first.

You have the right to receive medical help and access advice that will help you. It sounds like you feel the need to get reassurance from medical people so maybe that could be a starting point to you. You are saying that you are not sleeping at night, yet sleep is very important to our wellbeing. Getting in touch with someone who can help you with your sleep and the thoughts and feelings that you are experiencing is very important to start your healing. 

While all of your thoughts are valid to you, it is important for your mental wellbeing that you get the help that you deserve. There are other organizations that might be of help to you.  www.jigsaw.ie; www.yourmentalhealth.ie;  www.spunout.ie (if you are over 16) are just some websites that you might like to have a look at, which could help you understand what is going on for you or can offer direction in which way you can avail of other supports. The Childline website has some articles too, which you can have a read through www.childline.ie/how-i-feel/ 

You do not have to go through this alone. If you feel you cannot talk to somebody that you know just yet, then Childline is here for you and we really would love to listen to you. At Childline we are focused on you and what is important to you. The services are free and available twenty-four/seven. The team do not judge anything you say, but will listen to everything you wish to share. The ways in which you can get in contact are through the telephone service 1800 66 66 66, through the text service on 50101, or by web chat that you access through the website www.childline.ie.  

We hope that you find some of the above helpful. Remember you already have made a great attempt in reaching out and describing what’s going on for you.  

We hope to hear from you soon, 

Take care of yourself, 

Pat 

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