Pat's Answer

To Pat / 25 May 2019

Topic: Presured to have sex

Your Question

hi pat i was wondering what you should do if you feel presured to have sex i mean im 17 and im allowed to and i love my boyfriend and all but i dont want to have sex yet but i feel if i dont he will break up with me

From Pat / 24 July 2019


You are very welcome to Ask Pat and thank you for contacting us, you have been very brave.

You say you feel pressurised to have sex with your boyfriend, you love him and you dont want to have sex yet. you also say that you that if you dont he will break up with you.

It is okay to feel the way you do, it sounds like you are  not ready to have sex with your boyfriend and that is okay, the important thing for you is that you are comfortable with the way things are between you and your boyfriend. Have you had a chat with your boyfriend to let him know your feelings? It would be your right to let him know how you are feeling. If you dont feel comfortable chatting with your boyfriend about this you would have the right to chat to a trusted adult, maybe a Parent, Relative, someone that knows you well. We here at childline would be delighted to have a chat with you and our service is confidential, you can contact us at  1800 666 666 and we are open 24 hours a day.  It sounds like you have a sensible attitude towards having sex with your boyfriend and it sounds like you are just not ready yet. 

There is also a support service  called B4Udecide, which is run by the HSE, you can contact them at, they have lots of information on their webite.

We wish you well.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there’s nothing too big or small.