Alex's Answer

Overreacting

Your Question

i feel like im overreacting but my dad used to scream at me and shout at me whenever id eat ‘loudly’ (i was like under 6 what did he expect..) and i think that caused me a chain reaction and im scared of eating infront of people and eating in general. my family told me to suck it up and that he was mentally ill at the time but i dont forgive him.

Answer

Hi there, welcome to Ask Alex.
 
Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story. It takes a lot of courage to open up about something so personal, and we’re here to support you. It’s completely normal to feel confused or upset about how you’ve been treated, especially when it impacts your daily life like eating does.
 
What you described sounds really tough. Being shouted at as a child, especially during something as natural as eating, can leave deep emotional scars. It’s understandable that this experience has made you anxious about eating in front of others. Remember, your feelings are valid, and you are not overreacting. It’s important to recognise how past experiences shape our present behaviours and emotions.
 
It sounds like your relationship with food has been affected by these past experiences. If you’re struggling with eating or find that your anxiety around food is overwhelming, you might benefit from speaking with someone who specialises in this area. There are resources like www.bodywhys.ie that offer support for individuals dealing with eating-related issues and body image concerns.
 
Your family’s response, while perhaps well-meaning, might not be addressing your emotional needs. It’s ok to need time and space to process what happened. Forgiveness is a personal journey and cannot be rushed. It’s important to prioritise your own well-being and find ways to heal that work for you.
 
If you would like to chat some more about this or anything else, you can always contact us at Childline. You can reach us by freephone at 1800 66 66 66 or via Messenger at www.childline.ie (just click on the purple chat icon). We are confidential, non-judgmental, and open 24/7. We are always here for you, for any reason, at any time.
 
Take care of yourself, know that you at not alone,
Alex

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