Alex's Answer

My mother threw my laptop at me a few times and smacked me in the face a few times....

Your Question

My mother threw my laptop at me a few times and smacked me in the face a few times and threatened to throw my phone out of the window. Is this normal? I’ve been raised in a household like this so it seems normal to me but when I asked my friends if they go through things like this they say that’s weird and that it’s not normal. I remember my sister got beat by my mum with a golf club but we just dealt with it and she even made jokes about it, so we never thought it was not normal. It doesn’t happen too often I don’t think, the last time it happened excluding today was three weeks ago. To me, this behaviour from my parents doesn’t really seem strange. But I think it might be to everyone else…

Answer

Hi there, you are very welcome to Ask Alex.  

Thank you for contacting us. We understand that it’s not always easy to share our thoughts and worries, but we also know how important it is to talk about how we are feeling. You have been very brave in reaching out, and you have the right to get help and support.  

You have said that on a few occasions your mum has threw a laptop at you, smacked you in the face and threatened to throw your phone out the window, and you have asked if this normal, as your friends think that it’s weird. It’s completely understandable that this would cause confusion for you, as like you have said, this behaviour from your parents doesn’t really seem strange to you. However, here at Childline we would be concerned that your mother has been threatening you and physically hurting you and your sister.  

Physical abuse involves a person using physical force against another person which causes or could cause them harm. It can be a single incident or something that is ongoing. Some examples of physical abuse could be slapping, hitting, pinching, and kicking. Deliberately hurting someone in any way using physical force is physical abuse and this is not okay. 

You have the right to feel safe and happy in your homeand your parents have no right to hurt you in any way, regardless of how often it may happen. There are laws in place in Ireland that protect young people from harm so that means there are organisations and support services available to keep children and young people safe from harm.  

You can call Tusla on 0818 776 315 from Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. You can also visit their Changing Futures website to find more information about their services: https://changingfutures.ie/  If you or your sister ever feel like you are in immediate danger, you should call emergency services any time by dialling 999 or 112. Those are freephone numbers that can be contacted no matter where you are if you are in danger.  

Talking to someone you trust about your experiences and how they make you feel might be something to consider too. You have the right to get help and support so maybe talking to someone you can confide in, a trusted adult such as a teacher, coach or school counsellor might be an option for you. If you feel that you are not ready yet to talk to someone you know, you are very welcome to chat with the Childline Team by phone on 1800 66 66 66, by text on 50101 or through our web chat on www.childline.ie. Childline services are free and confidential, and are available 24 hours, 7 days a week.   

Thank you for reaching out to us.  

Take care,    

Alex   

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