Alex's Answer

My friend's stepdad is threatening to hurt her

Your Question

Hey alex. So this is basically about my friend.. Lets call her tasha. So Tasha moved away about a half hour car ride. And I haven’t seen her in 2 years but we still text. And she told me her stepdad is threatening to hurt her, and is telling her what to wear and what not to wear. She didn’t explain, but he’s not doing it like you’d think. Like he’s not saying “no crop-tops” or “no short shorts” it was just a regular t-shirt he told her not to wear. Its weird. And he used to finger her sometimes when her mom was gone.


Hi there, 

Thank you so much for getting in touch with Ask Alex about what is going on for you. It sounds like your friend has a lot going on for and is experiencing a tough time at home. It is understandable that you may be worried about her and it is important that you look after yourself while you try to support your friend. 

Your friend has the right to feel safe in her home and the right to support. We would be concerned to hear that your friend’s stepdad is threatening to hurt her and fingers her when her mom is gone. These are both forms of abuse, and it may help your understanding of this area with this article:

Talking to a trusted adult is an important step. This could be a teacher, a school counsellor, a family member, or any adult you feel comfortable with. They can offer guidance, support, and help you and your friend through this difficult situation. Sometimes, having an adult involved can make a big difference in accessing the help your friend needs.
Túsla, the Child and Family Agency in Ireland, is also a valuable resource. Social workers at Túsla are dedicated to ensuring that all young people live in safe environments. You may need the support of an adult to contact Túsla, but they can provide professional assistance and help your friend find a safer situation.
Remember, you are never alone in this. Childline is here to support you and your friend. The team is available 24 hours a day, every day. You can contact Childline for free at 1800 66 66 66, or through Messenger at by clicking on the purple chat icon. The team can help you explore your options and provide the support you both need.

It’s essential to act, even if it’s difficult, because your friend’s safety and well-being are so important. By reaching out for help, you’re taking a vital step in ensuring they get the support they deserve. It is also important that you take care of yourself too. You are entitled to support, while you are helping your friend.

Take care, 


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