Alex's Answer

Hello, welcome to Ask Alex. 

Thanks for reaching out and sharing what has been going on at home. Your home should be a space where you can relax, a place to feel safe and at ease. This can be difficult if there is a lot of fighting going on.  

Having a lot of conflict in your environment can lead to feelings of stress, anxiety and sadness and these are normal feelings to experience. You may not be able to control what is going on around you, but there are a few steps you can take to distance yourself from the conflict and look after yourself. 

Firstly, we would recommend thinking of ways to create boundaries. Remember, it is not your fault people are fighting around you and it is not your responsibility to fix their problems or to take sides. If you can, try move to another space away from the conflict, somewhere you feel safe and secure and where you can focus on something else like music or other activities. 

Try to set time aside for the things that make you feel good. Hanging out with friends, playing sports etc mean that you will have more time away from home. Even if you can’t get out of the house, keeping up with your favourite hobbies will help keep you engaged with more positive feelings and boost your resilience. 

Share. If there is a close friend or trusted adult in your life whom you would feel comfortable opening up to, it might help you feel better to talk about what has been going on and getting it off your chest. You may feel anxious or guilty talking to other people about your family, but it is ok to do so. Whatever happens in the long term is not going to be down to you. You have the right to feel safe and well. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to someone you know, you can reach out to a support service like Childline. You can call Childline, 24-hours a day, 365 days a year through the free number 1800 66 66 66 or through the Live Chat in our website www.childline.ie . 

We hope this helps you deal with the fighting amongst your family. If it ever gets to the point where you feel unsafe at home, or anywhere else, you have the right to call the emergency services at 999 or 112. These calls are free and can be made from any mobile or landline. 

All the best, remember, you do not have to be alone, Childline is always here for you. 

Alex