Pat's Answer

My cousin has found out that I am gay

Your Question

Im gay and my cousin found out and now he’s all wierd and he threatens to tell and I just hate my life and I wanna kill myself 


Hi there, welcome to Ask Pat.  

You are so brave, thank you for trusting us with what is going on for you. We know it can be difficult to talk about how we are feeling, you are doing great. 

You are telling us that you are gay and those around you do not know yet. Your cousin has found out, and he is threatening to tell your family and friends. This is leading you to have suicidal thoughts. We are sorry your cousin is being weird with you. 

You have the right to your sexuality identity and to choose who and when you tell about being gay. Your cousin does not have the right to threaten you or make you feel bad.  We want you to know that we are concerned to hear you hate your life and you are thinking about killing yourself. You have a right to live your life and be alive, to be happy and feel safe. Can you think of an adult in your life who you could confide inThis adult does not have to be a parent, it might be a teacher or another adult family member. The adults in your life have a responsibility to care for you, to listen to you and get you any help that you may need.  

There are websites like who can offer support for your suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and who offers guidance to young LGBTQI+ people. You might like to look at these websites and get some information which may help you understand how you are feeling. Your mental wellbeing is important, and you are entitled to get help and support. The Childline website has some articles also on and if you would like to read them. 

If you feel that you cannot talk to anyone around you, we would really love to listen to you. You are welcome to talk to the Childline Team by phone on 1800 66 66 66 or by text to 50101 or through our web chat on Childline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and these services are free and confidential. We can help you look at what options are available to you. 

Thank you for reaching out to us, we are here to listen whenever you would like to talk. 

Take care of yourself, 


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