Alex's Answer

My adopted dad touches me

Your Question

My dad(adopted) touches me (M) i’ve been with them from since i was 7, everytime i’ve tried to tell someone like my other dad it’s dismissed as lies. i’m now 20 he still carries on, i really don’t know what to do. i feel itll all just be dismissed as me lying as i’ve come from a bad past. he does things im really not comfortable with regarding my genitals and it’s affected my relationships as it revolts me when a girlfriend has tried to start a sexual encounter

Answer

Hi there, 

Thank you so much for trusting ask Alex with what has been going on for you. You have been so brave in reaching out. We are so sorry to hear that this has been happening to you for so many years and that you have tried to tell someone and this has just been dismissed. 

No one has the right to touch you inappropriately and you have the right to be heard and believed. It is understandable that these experiences have impacted you in other areas of your life.

 It’s important to seek professional help to work through these thoughts and feelings. Therapists and counsellors are trained to help people heal from trauma. Organisations like Jigsaw and Aware  can provide support for mental health and emotional well-being. CARI is an organisation that supports young people who have been through child sexual abuse. Túsla is the Child and Family Agency in Ireland. Here, there are social workers whose job it is to make sure that all people under the age of 18 are safe. We know you have said you are 20 but this has been going on since childhood and they should be able to support you. You can find your local Túsla office here www.tusla.ie/get-in-touch/local-area-offices/. You may need the help of an adult to talk to somebody at Túsla, but it is important that you know, that the adults in your life as a child had a responsibility to keep you safe and get you help if you are not.  There are some articles on the Childline website too that you may find helpful www.childline.ie/what-does-inappropriate-sexual-behaviour-look-like/www.childline.ie/what-is-sexual-abuse/ 

You are never alone. The Childline team is here to support you and explore your options with you. We are open 24 hours a day, every day. You can contact us for free at 1800 66 66 66, or by Messenger at www.Childline.ie (just click on the purple chat icon).
 
Remember, there is hope and there are people who care about you and want to help you through this difficult time.
 
Look after yourself, and reach out anytime for support,
Alex

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