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Ask Pat Listing

How can I cope with anxiety?
are the mocks worth studying for because I feel like I will stress more if I study
am i worthless
Hi pat
I’ve recently just come to terms that’s I’ve been making exuses and trying to cover up how I’m feeling by diagnosing myself with different conditions to help me cope
For years I’ve been asking my mam to let me be tested for an anxiety disorder but she says I’m just a worrier my thoughts are starting to take over my day to day life and I dont know what to do any advise would be appreciated
Dear Pat,
I have tried to reach out to an online counsellor but i feel like she didnt know what to say to me so I hope that you read my letter because I really don’t know what to do.
My issue is embarrassing to talk about and isnt something i feel id be able to admit to someone that I know but i am yearning for a father figure in my life. I lost my dad at a young age because he was abusive to my mum so we had to move away, i dont remember him and therefore i am unaware of what i‘m missing by not having a dad, so i dont understand why i’m so desperate to have one.
Im finding myself drawn to middle aged men, anyone, who is male and middle aged who is willing give me attention. I am attracted to them but NOT in a sexual way, in a way where i want them to take me under their wing and treat me like a “daughter”, its crazy.. i know.
I have found however that men only give girls my age attention because they are after one thing : Sex. This is something i do not want at all and i have made it clear to the men i have talked to that i just want to be friends - i havent told them that i see a father in them though.
As soon as they get flirty or hint at wanting sex, i cut contact instantly and this leaves me with a heart ache which is unexplainable, i suppose like im grieving a dad but without noticing, i soon find myself attached to another man who has offered me any kind of attention.
I cannot stress enough that i am not attracted to these men in a sexual way and i am fully aware that this desperate need for a dad is unhealthy, i have tried SOO hard to stop getting attached to men but it just happens and before ive realised it, its too late to leave them because i worry about the heart ache again.
I really just want a father and im aware that i cannot find this in just any man but it hurts so much and it feels like an addiction now.
Nothing has happened yet Pat, but one of these people tried to kiss me and i pushed them away, they tried again and i had to push them away again. they did stop after that but now i feel my addiction and yearning for a father is leaving me in danger and im desperate to put this to a stop... but how?
Hey pat

I have something that’s worrying me a bit I think my teacher may be a child predator there’s this girl in my class who he always makes excuses to touch say on the shoulder or stare at her and get uncomfortable close one time they were so close they almost kissed and you can tell the girl is uncomfortable when he gets to close
I hate my family what do I do
what happens if a child tells you theyre going to commit suicide?
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How can I cope with anxiety?
are the mocks worth studying for because I feel like I will stress more if I study
am i worthless
Hi pat
I’ve recently just come to terms that’s I’ve been making exuses and trying to cover up how I’m feeling by diagnosing myself with different conditions to help me cope
For years I’ve been asking my mam to let me be tested for an anxiety disorder but she says I’m just a worrier my thoughts are starting to take over my day to day life and I dont know what to do any advise would be appreciated
Dear Pat,
I have tried to reach out to an online counsellor but i feel like she didnt know what to say to me so I hope that you read my letter because I really don’t know what to do.
My issue is embarrassing to talk about and isnt something i feel id be able to admit to someone that I know but i am yearning for a father figure in my life. I lost my dad at a young age because he was abusive to my mum so we had to move away, i dont remember him and therefore i am unaware of what i‘m missing by not having a dad, so i dont understand why i’m so desperate to have one.
Im finding myself drawn to middle aged men, anyone, who is male and middle aged who is willing give me attention. I am attracted to them but NOT in a sexual way, in a way where i want them to take me under their wing and treat me like a “daughter”, its crazy.. i know.
I have found however that men only give girls my age attention because they are after one thing : Sex. This is something i do not want at all and i have made it clear to the men i have talked to that i just want to be friends - i havent told them that i see a father in them though.
As soon as they get flirty or hint at wanting sex, i cut contact instantly and this leaves me with a heart ache which is unexplainable, i suppose like im grieving a dad but without noticing, i soon find myself attached to another man who has offered me any kind of attention.
I cannot stress enough that i am not attracted to these men in a sexual way and i am fully aware that this desperate need for a dad is unhealthy, i have tried SOO hard to stop getting attached to men but it just happens and before ive realised it, its too late to leave them because i worry about the heart ache again.
I really just want a father and im aware that i cannot find this in just any man but it hurts so much and it feels like an addiction now.
Nothing has happened yet Pat, but one of these people tried to kiss me and i pushed them away, they tried again and i had to push them away again. they did stop after that but now i feel my addiction and yearning for a father is leaving me in danger and im desperate to put this to a stop... but how?
Hey pat

I have something that’s worrying me a bit I think my teacher may be a child predator there’s this girl in my class who he always makes excuses to touch say on the shoulder or stare at her and get uncomfortable close one time they were so close they almost kissed and you can tell the girl is uncomfortable when he gets to close
I hate my family what do I do
what happens if a child tells you theyre going to commit suicide?
My very good friend (a girl like me) and I have a really good friendship and share everything with each other. We spend a lot of time together in school and in our free time. We link arms, visit museums, eat at cafes, walk in parks and share everything. I don't know if I am lesbian or bisexual but I feel like I love her. But I dont want to ruin our relationship by telling her how I feel if she doesn't feel the same, what should I do?
I think I got sexually assaulted a few times by a so called “friend” when I looked it up everything he did to me was exactly what they said was sexual assault. I talked to my school about it and they didn’t take me seriously and didn’t do anything and i think he will do it to an other girl
Is it possible for a child to change their second name? If it is possible, then how do you change your second name? I want to change my second name but I dont know

My second name comes from my Dad's side but I want to take my second name from my Mum's side because he abused my siblings and I. I'm not comfortable with having this second name, every time I hear the name on roll call at school it makes me feel sick and reminds me of things I want to forget.

My parents aren't divorced, he still lives with us (its a complicated situation) so will that have an impact on me changing my name? Is it even possible for me to legally change my second name? I very clueless on this topic

A confused 14 year old
Hey Pat!
I know I’m gay but I’m too nervous to come out to my family. I’ve only told three of my friends so far and they have accepted me which is nice (And it turns out none of them are fully straight either.) but yet I’m still scared. I feel like I will be accepted cause my godfather is gay and no one has ever talked badly about him. I feel like I should come out to them and let them know, but another part of me wants to still keep it a secret.
Basically my question is, when do you think would be a good time to come out?