Alex's Answer

Hi, welcome to Ask Alex. 

I would like to start by thanking you for trusting us with your thoughts and worries. You have made a very positive step today by opening up and speaking about what is going on for you. This is often not an easy thing to do so well done for doing so.    

You feel that you have been showing symptoms of autism and ADHD, but you have no-one to talk to about it. This must be very difficult for you as you have said it’s affecting your work at school and at home. Carrying concerns and worries without knowing who to talk to or being closed off by those closest to you when bringing up the subject must be extremely hard. We would like you to know we hear you, and you have the right to have information and support in finding answers for how you are currently feeling.  

It is important to have all the facts and information about different conditions and symptoms, as with autism and ADHD, the way these disorders manifest is very much individual to each person. Often, the “common symptoms” recognised in autism can also be seen in anxiety therefore, it is important to seek the appropriate medical advice to confirm the diagnosis, and to ensure you receive the correct support and treatment to meet your individual needs. This is something you could discuss with your G.P. who may then refer you to the appropriate services. There are many services available online, perhaps you’d like to have a look at the following websites to gather some useful information: www.adhd.ie, www.autism.ie, www.hse.ie, www.asiam.ie.  

 You mentioned the fact that your mom denies your struggles or blames it on the internet. It can be a difficult thing for parents/carers or indeed for anybody to come to terms with their child and/or loved one experiencing mental, emotional, medical or physical challenges so it may be helpful to keep that in mind when trying to broach the subject with your mom. It is important to consider the time and space in which to have these types of conversations. Try as much as possible to ensure there are no distractions and that the adult can and will give you their full attention. Can you think of a good time to speak with your mom? A time when she isn’t, for example, cooking dinner might make having the conversation easier for the both of you. Be honest and open about how it is making you feel and the difficulties it is presenting to you. You might want to try practicing the conversation so you know what you want to say to make sure you express yourself as best you can. You could also try writing her a letter about how you are feeling as this can be an easier way to communicate.

It is important that you get the opportunity to discuss your concerns with a trusted adult. Have you tried mentioning this to someone like an aunt or uncle, grandparent or teacher? You require support and information, and a trusted adult could help you find just that. They may also be able to help you have a conversation with your mom and/or dad to help them understand what is happening for you.  

You are welcome to talk to Childline by phone on 1800 66 66 66, by text to 50101, or through our web chat on www.childline.ie. Childline is here for you anytime and we are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Our services are free and confidential. We are non-judgemental, and we will not tell you what to do. We can help you explore what options may be available to you.  

Thank you for reaching out to us. We are here to listen, and we are here for you whenever you would like to chat. Please get in touch with us soon.  

I hope this information has helped you in some way.  

Look after yourself,   

Alex