I want to kill myself everyday because the people around me make me feel useless
I want to kill myself everyday because the people around me make me feel useless my cousin broke up with her boyfriend a year ago and I like him so me and him both like eachother she found out and said horrible stuff to me that is honestly pushing me to the edge and I don’t think I can do this anymore I just want to end it all
Welcome to Ask Pat, and thanks for getting in touch.
It sounds like you have been going through a difficult time and it’s a very brave move to reach out and share your problem. Talking about what is happening is a big step forward.
You mentioned that you are having thoughts of killing yourself as the people around you are making you feel useless. Also, that your cousin broke up with her boyfriend a year ago, and both you and him have developed feelings for each other. This has caused an issue in your relationship with your cousin, as she found out and said awful things to you which is pushing you to the edge and leading to thoughts of suicide.
We are concerned to hear that you have been thinking about suicide as you have the right to be safe from harm and treated with respect by everyone.
In relation to your cousin, sometimes people can say the wrong thing when they are upset or in pain. This is not excusing what was said to you, however, is there an opportunity to speak to her about how her negative comments have hurt you when the dust settles?
Also, you spoke about the people around you making you feel useless. I understand that the comments of others can really impact on how we feel about ourselves. Remember that just because someone makes a comment about us, doesn’t mean that it is true. Perhaps try spend time with people who are there for you and keep in mind that you have as much right to love, support and encouragement as anyone else in the world.
Sometimes connecting with others and speaking about what is going on can be a very helpful step towards getting the support you need when going through difficult times. In relation to your suicidal thoughts, have you considered speaking to a trusted adult such as a parent, relative, doctor or youth worker about how you are feeling?
Your mental health is so important and you have the right to receive medical assistance and to access the advice that will help you. You do not have to go through this alone. If you feel you cannot talk to somebody you know just yet, Childline is available twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week and the services are free. We are non-judgmental and we could help you look at the options that are available to you should you need more help. You can contact us through our telephone service on 1800 66 66 66, through our text service on 50101, or by webchat through our website www.childline.ie . You can also call the emergency services on 999 or 112 from any mobile or landline, free of charge if you believe you may act on these suicidal feelings.
There are also other organisations that you can reach out to for help including: www.jigsaw.ie; www.pieta.ie and www.spunout.ie (if you are over 16). The Childline website has some articles as well which you can have a look through: www.childline.ie/how-i-feel/
We hope that you have found this response helpful and please get in touch with any other questions. Take care of yourself,