Alex's Answer

I have another punishment

Your Question

i just got off of 2 week punishment and now i have another weeek for not cleaning my sisters mess she made even though i cleander the whole house even though they were both home all day and went to go pick up her bf nd wanted me to clean so he can come to a clean house soon as i got home.i feel like she coudlve did that while i was out.now i cant have my phone neither can i go anywere untill monday i hate her so much

Answer

Welcome to Ask Alex. Thanks for reaching out and sharing what has been going on for you
 
The step of just saying what you are feeling can be a major release, and it helps to know that someone is listening to what you have to say. We hear you.
 
You say that you have been on punishment for the past two weeks, and it was extended because you didn’t clean up your sister’s mess, even though you had cleaned the whole house. That must be very frustrating for you. Would we be right in saying that you are having to clean up again when you come home, even though your sister and mum are at home all day? Is that correct? Have you had a chat with them about this?
 
Opening the conversation can be a good start so that everyone is able to give their point of view on what is going on and make arrangements that may be more reasonable for everyone involved. It can be a good start to have the conversation and explain your point of view while allowing them the chance to explain where they are coming from too. You could practice what you want to say by writing it out or practising in the mirror before approaching the subject. It can also be helpful to set a time when everyone can give their full attention to the conversation.
 
If you feel that this may not work as you think they may not listen to what you have to say, maybe you could speak to a trusted adult who could support you and highlight how important this is to you. This could be a family friend, grandparent, or extended family member—someone that you trust and that will offer you support. Having someone who can help advise and support you in getting your point of view across can be very helpful. By introducing a person that listens to you and takes your point of view into account, it may make it easier for your mum and sister to understand.
 
You tell us “you can’t get your phone back or go anywhere until Monday”. This must be very annoying, especially when you have already been on punishment before this. We can see how this can be hard for you and how you feel it is a very unfair punishment, but it is important to remember that those around us try to set out rules and regulations to help guide and teach us, not always to hurt or punish us. You may find this article helpful www.childline.ie/how-to-manage-family-relationships/.
 
If you feel that you cannot speak to anyone around you at the moment, please know that our Childline service is available 24/7. You can call on 1800 66 66 66 or via Live Chat on our website at www.childline.ie. This is a non-judgemental service that will listen to you, explore your options, and is completely free. As was mentioned earlier, just speaking and getting those feelings out can really help.
 
We hope that some of the above information has been useful to you. Take care of yourself and know that you do not have to go through this on your own, we  are here for you,
Alex

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