Pat's Answer

I feel people are judging me

Your Question

Alright, This feels like a teeny, tiny problem but at my school, I feel people are judging me and something I call my ‘Inner Critic’ springs into action. I just judge everything I do, And I hate getting out of my comfort zone because my inner critic is saying ‘Don’t Even Bother! Youre gonna just fail anyways.’ And now I make everybody In my life an inner critic and I can’t even stop it. Please help! I don’t mind waitingI am sure lots more kids have bigger problems than me, But stillI’d love if you replied in two or three days. 

Answer

Hi there and welcome to Ask Pat. 

Thank you for contacting Ask Pat, it sounds like you’re having a tough time at the moment. Negative thoughts about ourselves can be really difficult to experience and can make us feel worried, upset or even angry. We are sorry to hear you feel people in school may be judging you. We are also very sorry to hear that this ‘Inner Critic’ judges everything you do and may even stop you from doing things outside of your comfort zone. It sounds like this Inner Critic has started expanding to how you feel other people in your life think about you and it is something that is becoming hard to control or stop.  

It sounds like you have called your negative thoughts your ‘Inner Critic’- well done for being able to identify these thoughts and spot them when you are having them. You have the right to be happy and you have the right to get help with managing these thoughts. Ask Pat understands that having an Inner Critic may make us believe negative things about ourselves that aren’t true, and this can make us feel low in confidence and upset. Have you thought about sharing these negative thoughts and how they make you feel to a trusted adult in your life, perhaps a parent, grandparent, aunt/uncle or someone you feel comfortable talking to?  

We would like to talk to you more about your Inner Critic and explore how it can make you feel. How would you feel about giving us a call on 1800 66 66 66, or a text to 50101 or having a webchat with us through Childline.ie so we can help you think about what might help with your Inner Critic? The services are free and confidential and available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. At Childline we really value your feelings and thoughts.  

You might also enjoy reading some articles on the Childline Website which may be useful to you: 

https://www.childline.ie/feelings-and-emotions/  

https://www.childline.ie/how-i-feel/  

Thank you for getting in touch and sharing your thoughts and feelings. Mind yourself and know that Childline is here for you. 

Take care,  

Pat 

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