Pat's Answer

I feel anxious when trying to make new friends

Your Question

I’m a 14 year old girl I’m in year 8, and whenever I push myself to make more friends because I only have one. I get really anxious and just give up.

Answer

Thank you for reaching out to us. We know it’s not always easy to talk about feelings but we also know the importance of talking to someone we trust. Talking about what is going on for you is a massive step in the right direction and you are very brave for sharing your feelings with us.  

You say that you get really anxious and just give up when you push yourself to make more friends. It is understandable that trying to make new friends causes you anxiety; we know how hard it can be. It’s important that you don’t push yourself too hard though and allow yourself to make new friends at your own pace. You also say that you only have one friend. Remember, sometimes having one good friend who is supportive and kind can be better for us than having multiple friends who aren’t there for us when we need them to be.  

Have you considered speaking to a trusted adult about how you are feeling? This trusted adult could be a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher, or any other adult that you feel comfortable speaking to. It is important that you consider why you feel very anxious when you push yourself to make new friends, and it is equally as important to discover ways that can make you feel happy because being happy is a right you deserve to have.  

Here are some articles on the Childline website which may be useful to you: www.childline.ie/feelings-and-emotions;   www.childline.ie/making-friends/  and this one might help too: https://spunout.ie/life/socialising/start-a-conversation   

The Childline Team would really enjoy talking to you about your feelings and what is going on for you. How would you feel about giving us a call on 1800 66 66 66 or a texting us at  50101 or even having a web chat through www.childline.ie ? The services are free and confidential and are available twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Childline does not trace phone numbers or IP addresses and we really put values on your feelings and thoughts.   

We are not sure if you are contacting us from Ireland or another country. If you are based in the UK, perhaps you might want to contact the Childline service operating there for some help, support and information that is relevant to where you live: https://www.childline.org.uk/. 

It was great hearing from you, and please know that you can contact us anytime.    

Take Care of yourself and be safe,  

Pat 

 

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