Alex's Answer

Feeling bad

Your Question

i feel bad for watching porn 

Answer

Hi there, you are very welcome to Ask Alex.
 
Thank you for reaching out to us. We understand that it’s not always easy to share how we’re feeling, but we also know how important it is to talk about our worries and concerns.
 
You have said that you feel bad for watching porn. First of all, it’s important for you to remember that there is no shame in being curious about sex or pornography. However, remember to approach pornography critically. Cast a critical eye on what you’re watching and do not compare yourself or your partner to the actors.
 
Nowadays, pornography is very easy to access, which means that children might be watching pornography before they’re fully ready. When consuming online pornography, it’s important to be aware of the strong fantasy element. When you’re young, it’s easy to believe that what you see in pornography is what sex is supposed to be like in real life.
 
But pornography rarely shows a healthy attitude toward sex and relationships. We also must remember that bodies come in all shapes and sizes and that pornography usually only shows a hyper-sexualized version of genitalia, breasts, and body shape.
 
Another important element of a healthy attitude toward sex is consent. Consent is the foundation on which a healthy sexual relationship is built. Consent is not just a yes or no. It should be enthusiastic and ongoing, something that is rarely shown in pornography.
 
As previously mentioned, there is no shame attached to curiosity, and therefore you should not feel bad for watching pornography. If you come across something that upsets or distresses you, find a trusted adult such as a parent, relative, teacher, or coach to talk to. An open, non-judgmental dialogue is the best way to build a healthy attitude toward pornography.
 
If you would like to talk about this in more detail, you are very welcome to chat with Childline through our freephone service on 1800 66 66 66 or through our webchat service, by clicking on the purple Messenger circle at www.childline.ie. Childline services are free and confidential, and are available 24 hours, 7 days a week.
 
Thank you for reaching out to us.
 
Take care of yourself,
 
Alex

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