Alex's Answer

Welcome to Ask Alex.

 

We want to take this opportunity to praise you for taking the brave step of sharing what’s going on for you and looking for support. It’s not always easy to discuss the challenges we’re facing, but it’s so important to get the support you deserve.

 

So, you’re asking if you can leave your parents. You’ve mentioned that they are narcissistic and self-centered, and that your mom always yells at you. This must be incredibly difficult for you, and we’re sorry to hear that you’re going through this. You’ve also mentioned that you’re 11 years old and harming yourself, which is very concerning.

 

Regarding self-harming, we strongly urge you to seek support for this. Reach out to a trusted adult, perhaps a grandparent or extended family member you’re close to, someone who can help you in finding the right help. There are many services available to support those who self-harm, such as Pieta House at www.pieta.ie, which offers a free crisis helpline at 1800 247 247 or you can text HELP to 51444. The Samaritans (www.samaritans.org/ireland/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/) also provide a free phone service at 116 123. Getting help for self-harming as early as possible is crucial, as the longer it continues, the more difficult it becomes to address, and the more it can affect your health. If you are ever in immediate danger, please call the emergency services at 112 or 999.

 

Regarding your parents, we understand that it’s hard to put up with yelling and negative behaviours. We suggest that you explore all available options before considering leaving, as this isn’t a straightforward process since your parents are your legal guardians in the eyes of the state. Have you discussed this with them? It’s important for you to have stability and to be heard and understood by your parents. Expressing you wanting to leave may help them understand the challenges you’re facing. We recommend, as mentioned earlier, talking to someone close to you whom you feel comfortable with and who can support you in talking to your parents. This may help your parents realise the true impact it’s having on you. Being open and honest about your feelings is so important for you to express yourself and for your parents to understand.

 

If you have family members living nearby, spending some time with them for respite while your parents process what you’ve told them might provide a new perspective, not only for you but also for your parents. Then, you can sit down and discuss how things can be different moving forward.

 

You’ve also mentioned the Live Chat, which you can access by clicking on the link; it no longer requires a login, so please do use it. The Childline service would be more than happy to discuss this further with you and help support you in working out what is best for you going forward. You can also contact Childline via phone at 1800 66 66 66.

 

We hope that the information above has been useful to you, and that you find the support you need.

 

Take care, and remember you do not have to be alone, we are here for you 24/7.

Alex